I can’t believe it’s already the end of May. This year has been such a busy year for me already. And in addition to everything else going on I’ve decided to throw starting a new writing career into the mix. Hubby says I’m a glutton for punishment at times. In this he might be right. But don’t tell him. I wouldn’t want it to go to his head. LOL.
One thing I’ve learned is that it takes a lot of work to simplify your life, to go through everything and decide what’s important and what isn’t. But I know once we’re done, we will both be happier in the end and that’s all that really matters. While it might not be easy, it is important for many reasons.
This year is all about building the life we want. For me, writing just happens to be part of that life. I love reading and I love conjuring up worlds and characters from the spark of an idea. There is nothing at all like taking this vague idea for a story… a character… a world, and turning it into a book. It is a magical process. One that is fulfilling in a way that is hard to explain unless you’ve experienced it yourself. I know a lot of authors compare it to having children, but since I’ve never had children I wouldn’t know. I guess it too is one of those things that’s hard to explain unless you’ve experienced it for yourself.
The process of putting words on the page can be hard and frustrating and emotional at times. It’s like a roller coaster where you get on all excited about the thrilling ride ahead. With each clack as it climbs to the top you get a little more excited. Then you crest that hill and the car suddenly drops and you throw your arms up enjoying the ride as you race at breakneck speeds toward the end. Only then you realize the track levels out so the thrilling ride of moments before has become boring and a bit tedious, or it stalls altogether, and you start questioning why you got on the ride in the first place. Other times there’s suddenly a wall in your way and you have to figure out to get rid of the way so you can continue the ride.
And just about the time you’re thinking about just jumping out of the cart—since it’s going at a snails pace and is no longer fun—the track suddenly curves and you realize the slow ride was actually a slow and steady climb. So while you thought you weren’t making any progress and that it was silly to get on this ride in the first place, you were actually climbing higher and higher it just wasn’t the steep climb of before. But when you round that curve, you find yourself suddenly dropping at a faster speed than even before, but this time you see the end in sight and you noticed the fun loop-to-loops and the corkscrews and the splash pool ahead.
And you remember why you love this particular roller coaster.
So once it comes to a stop and you get out, you hurry to get back in line, excited to ride it again and again. Knowing the ride is never exactly like the one before, but the end result is always the same. No matter how good or bad, if you ride it until the end you will have a book.
I took a few years off from writing this particular roller coaster, but I’ve missed it and so here I am standing in line again, waiting for my turn to ride.
With my current WIP (work in progress) I’m still in the going downhill a breakneck speed phase of things. I know the boring part is going up fast and that all I’ve got to do is write through it so I can get to the good parts that await me ahead.
I also know that no matter what I’ll end up rewriting large sections of this book before all is said and done. The first chapter is pretty much a given. I never know how to start a book and I often find that simply deleting that first chapter altogether makes it better. But I need that horrible first chapter to get me started, to work out in my head who my character is and what exactly it is they want. See, I’m what the call a pantser. That’s what they call writers who write without an outline, also known as writing by the seat of your pants. Hence the name. Although, I prefer to call myself an organic writer. I organically let the story unfold by listening to my instincts and my characters. I’m not always right and I admit I end up doing a lot of rewriting and revising before a book is ready, but I would bet that I probably spend about as much time revising and rewriting as a plotter does plotting out their book. The only difference is that I don’t have any preconceived ideas about what my storyline is going to be. I’m not trying to force my characters to do X, Y, and Z because I think that’s what should happen. Instead, I let my characters dictate what happens.
I trust that I’ve read enough books and that I’ve written enough and studied enough, to know what a good story is and what it isn’t. I might not be able to break it all down into things like acts or beats or whatever. I might not be able to tell you why it works. But knowing the why of things doesn’t mean I don’t understand them. I don’t have to know how to sing to know a good song when I hear it. And just because I can’t sing, doesn’t, mean that I couldn’t write a song myself. Not being able to carry a tune also doesn’t stop me from singing—just ask Hubby’s poor tortured ears—but that’s neither here nor there. My point is, I don’t have to be able to explain why a book is good to know that I like it and it’s that very same thing that lets me know when my own writing is ready to be released.
I’ve found that most of the times when I have an issue with a scene or a section of the book, it’s because, for whatever reason, I stopped listening to my instincts. Those are usually the places were I begin to think I know what’s going to happen and where it’s going. And almost every time I start thinking that… I’m wrong.
For me, I have to write from my subconscious and not my conscious mind. Because my conscious mind is worrying about more things than just writing the best story I can. It’s worrying about things like marketability, cover art, release dates, branding, etc., etc., etc. None of which matters until you actually write the book. It’s only when I get out of my own way and stop thinking that the magic happens.
So here’s to riding roller coasters and getting out of your own way.
*Writing is a very personal process. My way of doing things is just that, MINE. If you want to be a writer, then you need to figure out what works for you and don’t worry about “doing it right”. There is no right or wrong way, as long as you get the words on the page then nothing else matters.
data-animation-override> “Remember: when people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work for them, they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong.”
I recently picked up a book by a new to me author, Lexi Blake. I read the first one and then realized there was an entire other series leading up to this one, so I had to go back and start at the beginning.
So I picked up book one in her Masters & Mercenaries Series, The Dom Who Loved Me. This book is about Sean Taggart and Grace Hawthorne. I fell in love with these characters and the writing of Ms. Blake. She has a way of drawing you in and keeping you there from the first page to the last.
There are currently sixteen books in the series with almost as many novellas. (Something I didn’t realize until recently) I just finished the last book in the main series and will be going back to read the many novellas now.
There are other series, including a multi-author crossover series, that tie into the main one. A new tie-in series will be coming in August. It’s called Masters & Mercenaries: The Forgotten. I look forward to reading the new series, as well as her other books.
If you like a good storyline, strong characters, well-written sex scenes, and plenty of action, then you’ll like Lexi Blake. Be sure to stop by her website http://www.lexiblake.net to check out her books and sign up for her newsletter.
The last two week there hadn’t been a blog post because our U-verse was down and since I got rid of my smartphone last year, I didn’t have any way to get online. Well, I guess I could have lugged my desktop to Barnes and Noble to use their internet but it seemed like more hassle than it was worth. Although, it might have been fun to see the looks on people’s faces. Could you image? LOL
Having no internet or television meant I got a lot done around the house. You know, all of those things that I’d been meaning to do but just could never find the time for. I also got a lot of reading done and quite a bit of writing as well. I’m still behind on where I would like to be with my writing schedule though, but having that extra time was nice. I’m starting to get back into a routine which helps.
Hubby and I also spent a lot of quality time together. Something we haven’t done nearly enough of in the last few years.. We’ve been together a long time and it’s easy to find yourself in a rut. We don’t have children so it’s not like we have to plan a date night to be alone. But I’ve started to realize that we still need the occasional date night, so to speak. It doesn’t have to be an actual date, but we need to make time to be together away from the television, computers, and other distractions. A time where the two of us can just talk and reconnect with one another.
Supper time has become my favorite part of the day. Until recently we always ate on the couch while watching television. About a month ago we started eating at the kitchen table where we can just talk without the distraction of technology. It’s a short time each day where we can talk about whatever is on our mind or share with one another something new. It seems so simple and yet changing that one little thing has made a difference. For both of us.
Too much of our lives have become about technology in some way or another. While I require technology to work, I’m going to try to spend less time online or sitting in front of a television and more time reconnecting with Hubby.
I’m starting to think maybe we should unplug the internet on occasion. Maybe one weekend a month? Do you have times when you put down the electronics, turn off the internet, and just unplug for a bit?
I’ve never been supermodel thin, nor do I ever want to be. And while I’m actively trying to lose weight this year, I won’t be going on a diet. See, I don’t believe in diets. I know that Keto is the new thing and I hear a lot of people have had great results from the diet, but dieting isn’t for me.
Now, you might be asking why I’m against dieting. The answer is: I’m not really. If dieting works for you, then go for it. But for me, dieting is a sure way to make myself feel bad. One thing all diets have in common is deprivation. They deprive you of fats, sugars, carbs, gluten, etc., etc., etc. Deprivation might work in the short term, but if you tell me I can’t have something then the only thing I’m going to want is the thing I can’t have. It’s not a very flattering character trait, but there you go. This is why diets don’t work, and will never work, for me.
Instead of dieting, I’m just being more conscience of what I eat and when I eat it. I’m also trying to eat more often, which might sound silly but in doing these small things I’ve lost fifteen pounds since January. If I want fried chicken, then I eat fried chicken. I’ll just make sure that the next really unhealthy meal is at least a month away. I now plan out my naughty days. That doesn’t mean that I don’t have other things that have been deemed “not good for you” between my naughty days. I do. I just have smaller portions. But I’m not depriving myself of anything.
Another change we’ve made recently is eating at the kitchen table. Hubby and I used to always eat on the couch while watching television. Since it’s just the two of us it was easy to fall into that habit. We have realized that we eat less sitting at the table. I don’t know why this is, but it is.
We’ve also started eating earlier than we used to and eating around the same time every day. This wasn’t possible with Hubby’s old job since his hours changed every night and we never knew what they were going to be until his boss called.
I’ve also cut back on the hours I spend sitting in front of a computer. But not only that, I’m also making it a point to move more. Even if that is just me pacing the kitchen while I talk on the phone or wait for my tea to steep.
See, I look at it as a lifestyle change. Because it’s not only what foods I put in my body, but a combination of a lot of things that go into creating a more healthy lifestyle. But again, I’m not depriving myself of anything, I’m just more careful about monitoring when I have those things that I know aren’t good for me. It’s about moving more, sleeping better, and building a lifestyle. One where I can indulge when I want to without guilt.
I’ve never worried about the number on the scale or the size of my pants. Those things never mattered to me or defined who I am. I know that’s not true for everyone. I know that some people struggle with their weight or think there is something wrong with them if they aren’t a certain dress size. For those people, I say, “Love yourself. Who you are isn’t determined by those things. Some people aren’t meant to be a size two. We are all different, so embrace your uniqueness and find the size that feels right for you. The one where you can eat those things you love without guilt or shame. Where you can get rid of the scale and be happy with what you see when you look in the mirror.”
For me, my size isn’t about a number, it’s about the way I feel. At the size I am now, I feel overweight and it’s having a negative effect on my health. I would like to lose another forty pounds, give or take. Not because of some societal view of what women should look like or anything, but simply because that was a weight I felt good at.
I think we, as a society, are too focused on physical looks, instead of focusing on the things that really matter… A person’s heart.
One of my goals for this year is to get healthy. Or at least healthier. The last few years I’ve put on a lot of weight and I’m to the point—or past the point really— where it’s time to do something about it. This is going to mean making changes in my daily habits. I’m going to have to work less and figure out way to move more. I used to do an hour of yoga every morning before I went to work, but as I took on more clients and my work day became busier yoga was one of the things that fell to the side.
As did breakfast and lunch most days.
And while I eat healthy food, eating one meal a day hasn’t helped anything because by the time I finally eat I’m starving and it’s late at night (usually around 9-10pm) which isn’t good for you either. So not eating processed foods, fast foods, or desserts doesn’t really matter.
Part of me getting healthier is going to be finding a better work/life balance. When you work from home it’s hard to justify taking that time off or not spending that extra hour to finish that project even though you’ve already put in nine hours today.
Or at least it is for me.
It’s really easy to go ahead and work for a few hours on Saturday or Sunday, which then turns into a full eight hours and before you know it you haven’t had a single day off in a month.
This year, I’m planning time off, taking weekends off, and getting out of the house more. I’ve had to be more selective of what projects I take on and what clients I work with, which means less money at the moment, but in the long term I believe it will be beneficial.
I’m also making time for me to write again, something, that like the yoga, fell to the side when other things started taking more time. After working all day I was too exhausted to even think about writing.
We are also planning to move. Hubby and I have talked a lot about living a simpler life and this is the year when we’re going to stop talking about it and do it. Our house isn’t huge by any means, but it’s still more house than we really need. We’ve decided that we want less stuff and more experiences. We’d rather have a smaller house with only the things we need so we can use the money that we save to travel, to go to shows, to have adventures, to build memories. We’re in the prime of our lives so why not enjoy these things while we can. When we’re old an gray (or in my case grayer) we can sit on our porch and reminisce about all of the things we’ve done.
And the other big change for this year… my writing career. Or more accurately, making the decision to publish and give this whole thing a go. Several years ago, I sold a few books to a publisher. Those books were published under a different pen name and were in a different genre. My experience with that publisher made me never want to go through it again. I fulfilled my contracts and then I walked away from publishing. I never stopped writing, I just wasn’t going to publish again.
Then I started paying attention to self-publishers and what they were doing. And I started doing research and learning just how much I DIDN’T know about publishing and running a business. For the last few years, I’ve worked hard to learn everything I can about publishing and I’ve honed my skills. But it wasn’t until something happened that made me take a good hard look at things, that I made the decision to give this writing thing another shot. Only this time around, I will have complete control. I know how to do things right. I have a business plan and I know what my short term and long term goals are for my writing. I have realistic expectations. And, I have the skills to produce the best products that I can.
There are a lot of changes happening and change can be scary (and I admit I’m scared), but it can also be exhilarating. At the moment, I’d say I’m equal parts scared and exhilarated, but I’m trying hard to focus on the latter. I’m choosing to stay positive and believe that everything will work out the way it’s meant to, even if that means failure. Sometimes, the only thing we can do it be brave and move forward.
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