by Nikki Amare | Jan 1, 2020 | Musings
Goodbye 2019. Hello 2020
I can’t believe it’s already 2020. The last two years have just disappeared in the blink of an eye. Or at least it seems that way to me. While I’ve accomplished a lot in the last two years, it hasn’t been nearly as much as I had hoped. We’ve had a lot of setbacks concerning the move. There are days when it feels like we’re never going to get out of here. I’ve also had some setbacks with my publishing plans, mainly due to the move. But I’m still writing and doing my best to remain optimistic. Which is really all we can do sometimes. I’ve found that things rarely go the way I plan or hope. I just try to make the best out of what I have. It’s not always easy but the more I try to focus on the good things the easier it become.
I’ve gotten quite a bit of writing done this year. Finished a few things, started several more. I’m not sure of my total word count for 2019 since I don’t really track stuff like that. Although, I do plan to in 2020—whether I actually do is another story. I have an app called Word Keeper that makes it easy to keep track of that stuff so I’m going to try to get into the habit of using it. Although word count isn’t as important to me as it is to some writers. Still I think it would be nice to be able to look back and say, “I wrote this many words last year.”
My goal for this year is to finish writing one series and write at least two books in another one. Ideally I would like to have the complete series written before releasing book one. Or, if not the entire series, at least three books. It’s risky since I will be putting a lot of time and money into writing and publishing a series that might not sell, but as a reader I know how frustrating it is to start reading a series only to learn it was never finished for whatever reason. I never want to do that to my readers. Even if only one person reads the series and enjoys it then it will be worth it to me. I might never make back what was invested in those books but that could very well be true for any book released. There are no guarantees in life and even less in publishing.
I’m choosing to start 2020 with optimism. Each year is a chance to be better, try new things, change the things that didn’t work, and be brave enough to take risks.
So here’s to 2020—the year of taking risks and being brave.
Be Brave! Be Bold! Be you!
by Nikki Amare | Dec 18, 2019 | Musings
Christmas is almost upon us. Just one more week to go. I can’t believe 2019 is almost over. We don’t have a tree up and odds are we won’t put one up this year anyway. When Hubby and I first got married I used to go all out for the holidays. Tree, ornaments, the whole nine yards. But then we would end up spending almost every day at his Mom’s since his brother always came home for two weeks around Christmas and Hubby wanted to spend as much time with him as possible since it was the only time he got to see him back then. After a few years I stopped decorating since we were never here to enjoy it really and it just seemed like a lot of effort for nothing.
We got rid of our fake tree about ten years ago. And a good portion of the decorations I had accumulated over the years.
Since my birthday is in November and Hubby’s is in December we’ve never gone wild with Christmas presents. In the beginning we would buy the main presents for our birthdays and then just get something small for Christmas. Then after a few years we decided to just buy birthday presents and then for Christmas we would decide on a big item we both wanted and get it as our Christmas present to one another, although it didn’t have to be at Christmas. One year we bought a new television in October when it was on sale. That was back when flat screens were super expensive. Another year we bought a dishwasher.
The last few years, however, we’ve stopped buy gifts altogether. We have more stuff than we need anyway and we realized we were buying gifts because it was expected. Now we go out to eat at a nice restaurant for our birthdays.
And for Christmas… well, we still don’t do gifts. I don’t see that changing either.
We’ve decided once we finally get moved we want to start new traditions. We haven’t decided what they will be yet, but we already have a few ideas. But the no presents thing will continue. And if other people insist on giving us gifts, we will ask that instead of buying something new that they either make something, buy it secondhand, regift something that they already have, or support a local artist.
Really though, Hubby and I have enough things. That doesn’t mean we’ll never buy anything ever again. it’s just that we plan to be more choosy about what and how we buy. Buying secondhand means giving new life to older items. It means no plastic packaging. And it means not supporting the industries that care only about making as much money as possible instead of their employees or their impact on the environment. It also means often times getting better quality things for cheaper than what they would have cost new. I figure if a mid century modern couch is still in good shape all these years later, then it’s worth spending a little extra to get an original rather than paying for a cheaply made reproduction. Let’s face it, things were made to last back then. Now days they are made to be disposable, forcing you to replace it after only a few years.
It’s been almost fifteen years since Hubby and I bought one another presents for Christmas. During the holidays we focus instead on spending quality time with each other and the ones we love. Because to me, that’s what the holidays are really all about.
I hope you all have a happy holiday season regardless of what holiday you celebrate. This will be my last post until after the new year. So have a wonderful holiday and a very happy New Year. I’ll see you in 2020.
by Nikki Amare | Dec 4, 2019 | Musings
Hubby and I had a nice Thanksgiving. We ended up just doing one Cornish Game Hen instead of two. With the green bean casserole and the homemade rolls it was plenty for the two of us. There was enough green bean casserole left over for a second meal but that was all. We don’t typically have a lot of leftovers these days. The exception being rice since we often make a double or triple batch depending on what we’re planning for the week. If we’re doing fried rice then we always make extra earlier in the week since fried rice is best made with day-old rice. I also like to have a rice bowl for lunch some times and I don’t usually want to take the time to make the rice in the middle of the day so I’ll make a little extra the night before.
The more attention I actually pay to things the more I realize how much we used to waste. Food used to be a big one for us. We’d buy a bunch of fresh stuff and then a week or two later we ended up throwing half of it away because it had gone bad before we’d had a chance to use it all. When we did use it, we seemed to make way too much and always had a ton of leftovers. Hubby is not a fan of leftovers, so more often than not they would sit in the fridge until they too got thrown away.
Now we try to not have accidental leftovers. We do this by planning meals. When we do meal planning it isn’t this big elaborate thing. We used to sit down together and come up with a plan for the entire week, but we’ve sort of fallen out of that habit. Now it’s more than we’ll put a chicken breast out and decide we’re going to use half of it to make something like chicken and peppers or honey chicken one night and then a night or two later we’re going to use the other half to do another chicken dish. Same thing for pork. We have our favorite dishes that we do a lot but we always try to find new dishes to try on a regular basis. Sometimes that new dish is just a different variation on one we’ve already had. But we are more careful about how much we make. Like I said before, we rarely have unplanned leftovers. Which I means less food waste. It also means a lot less clutter in my fridge.
We still produce a lot more waste than I would like. These days there is hardly any food waste, which is a good thing. The other waste is harder to eliminate but we are slowing removing things from our lives. In the beginning I admit it was hard to think of a life without plastic. I mean, plastic is everywhere. But I started small and the more I eliminated the more I want to figure out ways to completely do away with the plastics. Because while I’m sure waste free or zero waste feels great, I’m not sure how realistic it is for us. Especially now. But we’re making an effort to eliminate plastics as much as possible. I don’t think it’s about being prefect or making huge changes all at once. It’s more about being aware of the impact we have on the environment and then consciously making an effort to do better.
by Nikki Amare | Nov 28, 2019 | Musings
Today is Thanksgiving for those of us who live in the US. It’s a time of year that families typically come together and create a large feast. Turkey is usually involved, but not always. This year, since it’s just Hubby and I we’ve decided to skip the turkey and get a couple Cornish Game Hens instead. We’re not going to do the usual fair of a million side dishes and at least three different dessert options like we normally do either. We’ll probably do the birds, one or two sides, and some rolls. Nothing too fancy but something that’s at least reminiscent of the traditional holiday meals we both grew up with. But without a month worth of leftovers.
To me, this holiday is about family and friends. It’s about being thankful for those in our lives and the time we had with those who are no longer with us. It’s about being thankful for the people, not the things, we have.
Celebrate the important things. I know I will.
Happy Thanksgiving!
by Nikki Amare | Nov 20, 2019 | Musings
Pro Tip: When scheduling a blog post double check the YEAR it’s scheduled. This post was meant to go live last Wednesday but since I accidentally scheduled it for November of 2020, you’re getting it a little late.
I watch a lot of YouTube channels and read a lot of different blogs. My interests vary from writing / publishing to homesteading to zero waste. I have goals for all of those things and I’ve found that my goals don’t usually meet what others thinks my goals should be or what they consider a real writer/homesteader/zero waster to be.
When it comes to publishing, I want to be able to write books and share them with others without letting publishing take over my life. I would like to be able to consistently make 30,000-50,000 dollars a year—after taxes and expenses. I see things online where others will say something along the lines of… in order to be a real writer, you must do X, Y, or Z. None of which I’m doing or plan to do.
One of my favorites is that in order to be real writer you must write every day. It’s right up there with in order to write a book you have to plot.
I don’t write every day. I’ve never plotted a book and don’t plan to. And I’ve yet to publish a book under this pen name. Yet none of those things make me less of a writer. It’s Wednesday now as I write this. On Monday I wrote over 12, 000 Words. Tuesday I wrote 500. Today I haven’t written anything on any of my three works in progress. I don’t write consistently and I don’t plan to spend a ton of time on social media or going to conventions. Some people would say I’m not a real writer or I’m not serious about my career.
The truth is that we just have different goals. We want different things and that’s okay. I learned some hard lessons the first time around—about publishing and about myself. Publishing consumed my life and five years after my first book came out I walked away from publishing. In part because of my health issues and other family issues that required my attention, but also because I had let publishing take over everything for so long I was burned out. I honestly never thought I would get to the point where I would ever want to write again, let alone even consider publishing.
It took me more two years before I could even read a book again just for enjoyment. Along the way I’d trained myself to analyze every story to see what they did right so I could improve my own writing, because I listened to the more experienced authors who told me I had to do X, Y, and Z in order to be a “real” writer or to be successful. Instead of making me a better writer it cost me the joy of reading and it made me constantly second guess myself. I started worrying more about getting it “right” instead of just writing the story. And soon I would find myself sitting at my desk writing the same sentence or same chapter over and over and over again. Trying to write the book you think you should write is the best way to sabotage yourself.
And sadly it took much longer than it should have for me to realize I was wrong to listen to them. Their idea of success wasn’t the same as mine. And even though I didn’t feel like a “real” writer, I was. I am. Even if I were to decide not to publish another book for the rest of my life, I’d still be a writer. I stopped publishing several years ago but I didn’t stop writing. Not really. Yes, it was six months or more before I put words to paper again and I convinced myself since I wasn’t writing with the goal of publishing, it wasn’t really writing. Or that it didn’t count as writing because a lot of the stuff then was more just scenes or ideas that popped into my head. Ideas I knew I wasn’t ready to pursue, but thought was too good to just forget.
Writing is just as much a part of who I am as the color of my hair. I’m a writer, a storyteller. Its not just what I do but who I am.
So while my definition of success might look different than yours it doesn’t make either of us wrong—just different. So the next time some says in order to be a “real” fill in the blank, ask yourself if their… advice lines up with your goals. Question whether or not you would be happy with their definition of success. Odds are following their game plan won’t make you happy. Don’t be afraid to do things differently. Don’t be afraid to ignore the pressure to do things the way others think we should. Figure out what you want and be brave enough to go after it.
by Nikki Amare | Nov 6, 2019 | Musings
I used to be a sugar junky. I was never someone who ate a lot of desserts. In fact, I rarely ate dessert because I didn’t, and still don’t, like sweet foods. Drinks, however, were another matter altogether. I used to drink Mountain Dew. A lot of Mountain Dew. Then I decided to give up caffeine and I think I slept for three weeks before I decided that a little caffeine wasn’t bad and started drinking a cup of tea in the mornings just to get me going. Then throughout the day I would only drink water. This is still the case. But in my tea I would put something like three or four tablespoons of sugar. And yes, you read that right. Tablespoons! Not teaspoons.
Once we started eating more and more Japanese food I noticed that my tea was tasting awfully sweet even though I was using the same amount of sugar I normally used. So I started to gradually decrease the amount I used over several months. I went from three of four tablespoons of sugar in a twelve ounce cup of tea, to two teaspoons. And honestly, I’m at the point where it’s starting to taste overly sweet again, so I’ll be reducing it a bit more.
After I started cutting back on sugar I started to notice how sweet things were. Food actually tastes better to me now.
There are several things, like avocados, that I wouldn’t eat a few years ago. Hubby has always loved them but every time I tried them they tasted like nothing. They have a very mild flavor but with all of the sugar I consumed throughout the day I wasn’t able to taste anything. So to me avocados were just a flavorless mushy texture. Now, I love avocados. We eat them at least three times a week on average.
American grocery stores are full of sugar-laden foods. Everything seems to have sugar or high fructose corn syrup in it these days. Or worse, some kind of sweetener that leaves a horrible aftertaste. I know the sugar is supposed to be worse for you, health wise, but, for me, the sweetener is definitely worse. The only sugar substitute I’ve found that I actually liked was the Monkfruit sweetener, but it’s ridiculously expensive and I’m too cheap. It’s easier to just use less sugar.
In the beginning I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to do it, honestly. Just half a scoop less of sugar in my tea made it bland. But I stuck with it determined to cut back. After a week or so of drinking it with just a little less it began to taste sweet again. Once that happened I cut back just a little bit more. And I kept doing that over several months. I would just reduce it by a small amount and as soon as that amount started tasting sweet again I would add a bit less. There were always days in there were I was more or less choking down the cup because it just wasn’t sweet enough, but usually by day three of the reduced amount it was tolerable again. Usually it was a week or two before it started to taste sweet. I might allow myself a few days of that sweetness before I reduced it even more. When I was stepping it down I was meticulous about measuring the amount. It made it easier to step down, for one thing. Another was it gave me a sense of accomplishment when I no longer had to use the bigger measuring spoon. I think that also helped with the process.
I don’t plan on giving up sugar altogether. I don’t think that’s realistic. At least not for me. But I think less sugar is definitely a good thing.
