by Nikki Amare | Oct 28, 2019 | Musings
For the last year, Hubby and I have eaten mostly Japanese cuisine (with the occasional Korean or Chinese dish thrown in there as well). It wasn’t a conscience decision. Like we didn’t sit down on day and say, “Okay, let’s start only eating Japanese food.” It was more that we both really like Japanese food and Hubby—who does the majority of the cooking these days—found a few recipes he wanted to try. Those few turned into a few more and then he started making sushi and before we knew it we were eating Japanese food six out of seven nights a week.
But here’s the thing, once we started eating less and less American food, we both lost weight and started feeling better. As I started to research more on the Japanese diet I learned that it’s one of the healthiest diets in the world and that Japan has the largest population of octogenarians in the world. So they clearly must be doing something right.
Another thing I’ve recently noticed; on the nights when we do eat something other than Japanese or Asian cuisine, I wake up the next morning practically starving. My stomach will be growling and I can’t wait to eat. Not to mention I usually end up eating more than normal. That’s not the case after a Japanese meal.
Usually in the mornings I’ll wake up and it will be an hour or two before I start to get hungry. I will make myself something like bacon, eggs, and toast or oatmeal. Which aren’t typical Japanese breakfast dishes but they are a lot smaller portions than I used to have.
Then for lunch I’ll have noodles, or rice and some kind of fish usually. Occasionally I’ll have leftovers, although these days there are a lot less leftovers than there used to be since it’s easier to cook for that meal only. Unless we intentionally want leftovers. (I sometimes make extra rice so I don’t have to make it for lunch the next day.)
Another thing is, it doesn’t take nearly as much to make me feel full. Not only do a feel full but I stay full throughout the day. No more being hungry an hour after I eat. I believe it’s because of the umami found in most Japanese dishes. Something that isn’t really found in other cuisine.
With almost every meal we have a bowl of miso soup—miso is a fermented soy bean paste—the fermentation is good for gut health and it tastes good. In a traditional Japanese meal you don’t serve drinks with your meal. I used to drink a glass or two of water with each meal. Now, I don’t even take a cup to the dinner table with me anymore.
When I show people pictures of a typical meal at my house I usually get one of two responses: I’d need bigger portions or I don’t like vegetables.
When it comes to food in America portions are huge—especially the meat portion. Everything is supersized and overly large or else we don’t feel like we’re getting enough for the hard earned money we’re paying. But all of that supersizing has led to the obesity epidemic that plagues this country. Or at least greatly contributed to it. Whereas, a typical Japanese meal is made up of several small portions, the meat isn’t typically the main focus of the meal. And the meats used are usually healthier than what the average American meal uses. Lots of fish, chicken, and pork.
We eat a lot of vegetables; cooked, raw, pickled. We always have but it seems like we eat even more now and a wider range of them. We also make and eat a lot of pickles. Now when I say pickles I’m not just talking about pickled cucumbers. We’ve tried pickling a few different veggies. Some were successful, others… not so much. Cucumbers are of course the obvious choice and a favorite of ours. We have several different pickling recipes we do so that even with pickled cucumbers we still have a variety of flavors.
As the weather starts to get colder I’m looking forward to more ramen, golden curry, and wonton soups. I love soups and stews in the winter. I’m hoping to talk Hubby into doing a hot pot again as well. (I love interactive foods)
I’m not saying everyone should switch to a Japanese diet, but I think we could learn a lot from the foods they eat and the way they eat it; smaller portions, less sugar, more fermented foods, and fresher ingredients.
by Nikki Amare | Oct 19, 2019 | Musings
The decision to take a big step back from social media means I’m now spending the time writing. I still have the apps on my iPad, but I no longer feel the need to check them constantly. I’m one of those people who hates seeing the little dot thingy (technical term) that pops up to let you know that you have notifications. I don’t like them so I will always click on whatever app has it just to get them to go away. Which meant I used to click on Facebook ten times a day or more to clear my notifications and then I’d end up scrolling through the feed and checking what was going on in some of the author groups. The next thing I know I’ve just wasted hours that I could have spent writing or doing something else useful.
In the last three months I’ve written more than I have this entire year. In fact, I wrote three novel length stories, a novella, and around 150,000 words on three other works in progress. Compared to the one novella, one short story, and around 80,000 words I had written in the earlier part of this year.
I still go onto social media ever so often. I typically check Facebook once a week and in the evenings while I’m watching television with Hubby I’ll scroll through Instagram durning the commercial breaks. A few times a month I will check out Pinterest for new recipes. But that’s been the extent of my social media usage the last few months and I find that I like it that way. I would much rather spend my time writing; whether that is a novel, a blog post, or a newsletter.
Social media is one of those things I’ve never been good at. Mostly because I live a boring life and I actually prefer it that way. I’m a homebody. My best friend teases me about being a hermit all the time since I will go weeks or even months without leaving my house. I’m not someone who has to go somewhere and do something all the time. If I could afford it I’m pretty sure I would just spent my days reading and eating and nothing else. Because I love books and good food.
My Instagram feed is pretty much all pictures of food. Either the beautiful food Hubby makes or the different loaves of bread I’ve made. There might be a few other things thrown in but that’s mostly it at the moment. I haven’t posted any pictures for awhile. I’m never going to be one of those people who thinks to reach for a phone or camera first, so there are a lot of times where we’re already eating before I think about taking a picture. Having the ‘no electronics at the dinner table’ rule means my phone is usually in the living room. So I have to make a conscious effort when I do take a photo.
But all of that means I don’t have a lot to share on a daily basis. I avoid drama in my life and online. I’m not big on gossip and I’m not up on the latest trends. And I don’t have time to search online for things to share just so I can share something.
So instead I’m going to focus on writing the best books I can and using things like Facebook ads to promote my books and hope that’s enough.
by Nikki Amare | Oct 3, 2019 | Musings
I’m finally home and trying to recover from my trip. In the last year I’ve chosen to avoid most situations that I know will cause my health issue to worsen. Hubby does the grocery shopping that way I don’t have to venture out. We rarely go out to eat or anything as we are both homebodies. It’s one of the reasons we’re planning to buy land and build everything ourselves. We want to create a place that we don’t want to escape from. A place were I can live a happy and healthy life without the need to constantly venture out into the world. Not that I plan to become a hermit or anything but this trip showed me more than anything just how easy it is for me to backslide when constantly bombarded by things like perfume, fabric softeners, scented candles, air fresheners, fumes from cars and planes, fumes from road construction, and a million other things I shouldn’t be breathing.
Even though my family is well aware of my health issues they still don’t think about things like putting clean sheets on the bed I’m going to be sleeping in. Normally this would be a good thing. I mean, who doesn’t like clean sheets, right? Except that those sheets had been recently washed and the smell of fabric softener was so strong that I almost immediately had trouble breathing. After two weeks I went from just having a bit of trouble breathing to coughing and being short of breath all the time. Not just from the fabric softener but because of everything combined. And that was with taking almost three times my normal amount of CBD oil a day.
I’ve been home a few days now and I’m still having trouble breathing and I’m still coughing. It will go away eventually I just have to tough it out since going to the doctor is out of the question at the moment. As least I’m no longer running a fever like I was the first few days.
The good news is that Hubby got a lot of stuff done while I was gone. He didn’t finish everything he’d intended but that wasn’t really his fault since the air condition went out while I was gone so he had three days of misery before they finally got the part to fix it. Since I left so he could paint, painting wasn’t happening when there was no air conditioning. Not only because it was almost ninety degrees in the house, but also because it was over severity percent humidity. So he didn’t get it all done but we’ve figured out a way for him to finish without it being too bad for me. At least we think we have. Until we do it we won’t know fo sure. Since the trip was kind of a short notice one I didn’t really have time to help him prep things as much as I would have liked. So now I can at least help with that part even though he’ll have to do the actual painting himself. Although, it will probably be a few more days before I’m ready to jump back in to the packing and stuff. Fingers crossed nothing else goes wrong.
by Nikki Amare | Sep 12, 2019 | Musings
For the last year I’ve spent a lot of time removing things from my environment and turning our house into a place where I can be without having to worry about triggers. I’m currently visiting family and I’m reminded of how many triggers there are. Fabric softener is one of the worst for me. It’s also one of the things that is everywhere and it lingers for a long time after the laundry is done. Just walking into my mom’s house I could smell the fabric softener. It clings to the pillows even though I removed the pillowcases because it was too strong.
Most people don’t think about, or realize, just how much scented stuff they are surrounded by on a daily basis. Since I’ve eliminated scented stuff from our lives my nose is super sensitive. I smell things I never would have before and things that didn’t used to bother me all that much do now.
But the reason for the trip was to get me out of the house so Hubby could paint without me having to be exposed to the paint fumes. It will also allow him to do some other things that he’s been putting off because he didn’t want to expose me to harmful chemicals and fumes. Now he has a few weeks to take care of everything and air out the house before I get back.
In the mean time, I’ve had to adjust the amount of CBD oil I take in order to be able to breath and I’ve had to wear my mask several times already. But I refuse to let my condition stop me from living.
By the time I get home I have a feeling I’ll be feeling worse than I have in awhile. Still, I will never regret the time I get to spend with my loved ones since I don’t get to visit often. Feeling bad for awhile is worth it in the end. But next time I think I might buy my mom a ticket to visit me instead of me coming to see her. That way I can enjoy the visit and still be able to breath when it’s over.
There probably won’t be a post next week. I’ll write a new post once I get home, but for now I prefer to focus on my loved ones rather than taking time away to write for my blog.
by Nikki Amare | Aug 28, 2019 | Musings
Being sick meant not a whole lot of anything got done, unless you count sleeping since that’s mostly what I did. I haven’t been writing a lot, but on the few good days I’ve had I have tired to find a few hours to get some words down. All of the reading I’ve been doing has really gotten my creative juices flowing and I’m currently working on four different books at once. I’ve tried to stick with one book and write it from start to finish before moving on but it doesn’t really work for me. I like to be able to bounce around between books, otherwise I find that I get bored. I’ve also realized I tend to write the start and ends of a book and then end up filling in the middle when I go back to edit. I’ve always ended up adding ten to twenty thousand words to a novel during edits but it wasn’t until just recently that I realized why that was. I remember reading that after edits your book should be 10% shorter than it was before, but that has NEVER been the case for me. No matter how hard I tried I always ended up making it longer. And now I know why.
Most writers will tell you that the middle is the hardest part to write. It’s necessary to the story but it’s the part that most writers would rather skip over. The beginning of a story is where we’re getting to know our characters and their goals. It’s where we figure out what makes them tick and what it is they really want, not just what they think they want. The end is the big finale, that thing we’ve been building toward, where all of our hard work and the character’s struggles pay off. The middle, eh, that’s where stuff happens, necessary stuff, but it’s usually not nearly as fun to write as the other.
I write the middle, it’s not like I completely skip over it or just put in a placeholder to fill in later—although it’s kind of like that. I write it but I don’t tend to put a lot of detail into things in the middle. It’s kind of like writing: She walked into a large room. But then going back and fleshing it out so that it ends up being: Gayle walked through the doorway, the sound of her boots on the polished marble floors echoed back at her, drawing her eyes up to the domed ceiling overhead.
See, both say the same thing but the second one fleshes things out and gives the reader a better idea of what the space looks like rather than just telling them it’s a large room. It’s the whole show vs tell thing. And while there are always scenes peppered throughout that need to be fleshed out more, I would say that seventy percent or more are in the middle of the story. At least for me.
I think understanding your process and accepting it is one of the things writers struggle with. For years I tried to change how I did things because I listened to those successful authors who said it had to be done this way and all that did was make it harder and harder for me to write. Because their way of doing things did not work for me. I tried to make them work. I forced myself to sit down and write every day. To try and only write one book at a time. And then I ended up getting frustrated and when I couldn’t figure out where to go next, instead of switching to another story and working on it for a bit, I would find myself either staring at the screen wondering why I couldn’t find the words, or writing something I knew I would just end up deleting later because it felt forced. So I went from writing a new book every three or four months to a year going by without having finished anything.
Now, I write the way that works for me. That’s binge writing or spending hours at a time writing as much as possible while the characters are fresh in my head and talking loudly. Then, when they go silent I will switch to another book and see if those characters are ready to talk again. It means, writing like crazy for days on end and then not writing for days or even weeks. It means not forcing myself to write a certain amount of words every day. It means writing until the story is told and then setting it aside for a few weeks or a month before going back to edit.
This isn’t something that will work for everyone. But it works for me and so I’m finally embracing my process.
by Nikki Amare | Aug 22, 2019 | Musings
It’s been over a month since I posted anything on my blog. I’ve been struggling with my health and most days getting out of bed was beyond my limits. I know it’s just part of dealing with a chronic condition, but every time I think I’m getting a handle on things then I seem to have a setback of some kind. The health issues have really stalled our move. We had planned to leave the first part of June, but here we are nearing September and we have at least another month or two worth of work to finish on the house before we can put it on the market.
After more than a month of being sick I’m finally starting to feel somewhat human again. I’m still struggling with the exhaustion and find myself sleeping more than usual but I know it will even out eventually. It always does. For now, I just have to listen to my body and sleep when it tells me to, otherwise I’ll end up sick again. Even while I was down Hubby continued to whittle down the list of things that needed to be done, although there are a lot of things that he can’t do by himself so hopefully those will be taken care of in the next few weeks as I start feeling better.
One of the upsides to the forced social media hiatus is that I realized just how much of my time I was spending on social media. Granted it wasn’t as much as most people, but it was still more than I really wanted to. I understand that social media is necessary for authors to be able to reach readers, but if I’m honest it’s not something I particularly enjoy. There are some aspects of it that I like but for the most part I could easily walk away from social media and never look back. If it wasn’t for the whole author thing I probably wouldn’t have any accounts except for maybe Pinterest, since I use it mostly to find new recipes to try. Life is too short to spend a lot of time doing something you don’t enjoy. I like blogging and writing newsletters, so I’ve decided that’s what I’m really going to focus on from here on out. I’ll still post occasionally on Facebook and Instagram but I’m going to try to limit my social media time to no more than 30 minutes a day. That’s across all platforms. I’ve even set that limit for my Screen Time (a mac application that allows you to track how much time you spend on a specific app) so that it will lock all of my social media apps once that limit has been reached.
Another good thing to come out of being sick was that I got a lot of reading done in between naps. I’ve found a few new to me authors who now fill spots in my top ten all time favorite authors list. While not every author landed on that list, I have found several other new to me authors that I’ll be keeping an eye on future releases. Since it’s been awhile since I did a “What I’m Reading” post I might put a few together to share the books/series/authors I’ve been reading lately.
I tend to read a lot of different genres and sub-genres, but lately most of what I’ve been reading has been in the realm of fantasy; either fantasy, romantic fantasy, fantasy romance, or urban fantasy. I’ve also read several sci-fi and sci-fi romance books as well. With a few contemporary romance thrown in there to break things up.
So while I continue to recover, I’m looking forward to getting back to writing and reading some of the new books on my e-reader.
